Arrugh, with a side of “what?”

Ah, the 3:30 am wake-up dream.

Yep, you read that right.

Full color and as real as it gets.

Some days I have to wonder if my mind inhabits several bodies at once.   If that’s so, then my other two bodies get to sleep for 9 hours each. 

Can’t they learn how to share?

Not that I mind being a 7 foot tall mind-reader with rust-colored skin. Well, yeah, I sorta do mind.

Have you any idea how much filth goes through the human brain?

When guys are between the ages of 13 and 60 they’re thinking with the brain that doesn’t reside in their head.  Women are stuck in Cinderella mode until we find out that no matter how many times you kiss a frog, it’s still a frog.

By the time a woman is 30, she’s starting to ask some serious questions like…

By the time she’s 40, her brain no longer looks to the mirror for answers.

By the time she’s 60, she understands what it really means to be married.

And men? If he’s lucky, he’ll chose a hot car, or a hobby, during his mid-life crisis instead of a mistress.

All that chatter in the human brain!  Few people are asking, “Why are we alive?  What is the universe?”

The number one question for women is, “Does this dress make me look fat?”

While the man looking at a voluptuous body inhabited by that same woman is asking, “Am I going to  get lucky tonight?”

When I go to sleep again, I’d rather not hear the chatter of a billion brains asking 

• What should I have dinner, leftover stew or ice cream?
• When will that lipstick go on sale so I can buy it at half price?
• Why was my favorite TV show cancelled?
• Why do cats exist?
• When will that kid get out of the bathroom so I can use it?

Yep.  The human brain tends to be a synaptic garbage dump of trivialities.  Perhaps when I sleep again, I can dream that I’m snoozing away in a hammock held up by two palm trees at the edge of a crystal clear beach.

Unfortunately, I know my brain all too well.  It will insist on filling that particular stretch of paradise with sand fleas.