First World Problems: Another in a series of 3am wake-up calls.

The usual 3 in the morning wake-up call.

Overly domesticated human navigates through a sea of spoiled dogs, finally landing on the toilet with a thud.

When you weigh 93 pounds, the thud sounds more like a “doink.”  I guarantee the toilet didn’t feel a thing.

I stumbled back to bed, started to drift off, and a cat walked over my forehead as if it were simply a bump in the road.

“A-WHAAA, A-WHAAA,” he screamed into my ear.  He sounds just like a newborn baby. 

I’m greeted with this face.

I sigh, roll out of bed, and check his food bowl.  A large ring appears around a bare spot.  

Cat: Give me more food! The bowl is empty! | Cat behavior, Food, Dog bowls

What does a half-comatose human do at 3am when she’s still half asleep?

Fill the cat bowl, make a pot of tea, write a post, and hope THIS doesn’t fall into my drink.

This is Florida.  On occasion, a roach manages to find its way inside your kitchen.  If you’ve poisoned your home to the point where no roach can survive when it’s 3 inches inside your house, I hope you have a will.

No matter how seriously you poison your home, your 4-footed companions, and yourself, there will be the occasional roach.

Better than the occasional alligator.

The cat is asleep, my tea remained roachless, and I’m still awake.  Guess I’ll finish watching a documentary about Nazi’s living in Antarctica who have spaceships.

I’ll probably fall sleep before they’ve built a base on Mars.