Senseless Sunday Sarcasm : Not happy?

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What a difference a rebuilt engine makes.

Too bad we can’t rebuild a brain as easily.

The engine in my Jeep used to go 0 to 60 in a day.   

Mine looks something like this, but the hood closes

Now, when I tap on the gas pedal, my Jeep goes 0 to 60 in a second.  The first time it happened I understood what it must be like to have a rocket propelling you into space.

If you’re facing a Monday morning that needs the reflexes of a race car driver, and all you can muster is a Jeep running on 3 cylinders that has a quarter tank of gasoline, you’re not alone.

Everything I do tomorrow will make this much sense:

It may prove to be a very explosive day for my nuclear family, when I look at my better half for the 20th time and ask, “Why would I want to put the groves in the marsh?”  

Did someone say, “Ye Haw?”

On a good day, my brain knows how to translate dyslexic hearing. On a good day, he will generally walk away as I take my clothes to the wash.   

On a bad day, Jihad would be preferable.

Once, I had the physique of this woman, sans the breast implants:

It’s a good thing Velociraptors don’t care if your boobs droop.

I know — I’m irreverent and when Monday morning arrives, I doubt I’ll have the mental capacity to care.

So go forth this Monday, all of you unwilling warriors fighting a thankless battle (which will probably include a lot of senseless paperwork).

Know that you are not alone.  Everyone will be thinking the same thing

IS IT FRIDAY YET - Frantic Cat | Meme Generator

 

 

Category : humor, work
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