More Senseless 1st World Problems

I keep breaking my nails. 

If you’re thinking this…

HA! You break a nail - disaster, or no big deal? | Problem ...

…you’re wrong.

It’s more like this:


15 Brittle Nails Home Remedies and Onychorrhexis ...

I went to the website using this picture, but whatever language it’s written in looks like hieroglyphics to most of the western world.

Where am I going with this painfully useless trivia?

Here’s what the driver’s side door to my jeep looks like:


See that curve under the door handle?

On Friday, we had the first torrential rain in weeks.  I was reaching over to get my purse from the passenger’s side and my foot slipped on wetness.  

Were I a cat, my nails might have saved my ribs from the assault.  As a human who is 5 1/2 times larger than the coon cat, my rib caught the edge of the door.

I was sore, but nothing that Ibuprofen couldn’t relieve.  I did yoga every day, but couldn’t quite stretch out.  Then, on Monday night (or it could have been early Tuesday morning), THIS decided to use my ribs as a trampoline.  

20 pound coon cat

The rib soreness became sharp, stabbing pain quicker than a Corvette can go from 0 to 60MPH. 

It wasn’t the first time a coon cat fractured my rib

Yes…Chilly Coon Kitty’s brother, who passed away 2 1/2 years ago, attacked the same rib.

I’d forgotten just how painful something as trivial as a cracked rib can be.  Yesterday, it only hurt when I was standing, sitting, walking, carrying papers, breathing and eating.

My better half suggested using a brace.  The sharp stabbing pain is now a dull stabbing pain. That, I can live with.

Tomorrow, I’ll be wearing a dress to work.  It’s not that easy to hide a brace under a polo shirt.

I’m told that no one can understand the mind of a woman.  Wrong!

It is far harder to understand the mind of a cat.