My son’s birthday with cat hair and oboe

My favorite son, relaxing with kitty-witty
In 1976, you didn’t know your child’s sex until the genitals emerged. My husband had always wanted to name a son Robert, so we agreed that if “the baby” was a boy, we’d name him after my father, Robert, as long as I could choose the girl’s name.
The two weeks before Robert’s birth, a new, exciting, and revolutionary product arrived on the market: Arm & Hammer laundry detergent. Like many other women, I rushed to buy and try this marvel of science.
Oh, it worked so gloriously well. Unfortunately, the hives that developed from my feet to my neck rivaled the Matterhorn.
With 5000 lumps of itchy misery, and being 9 months pregnant, doctors immediately treated the problem with cortisone shots and brain deadening creams.
But that wasn’t the end of it. I didn’t know the hives were from laundry detergent until 2 months after my son was born, so two weeks later I still had to use the mystery cream and get cortisone shots for a condition that wouldn’t stop trying to drive me insane.
Three days before giving birth, the labor pains began — nothing hard and fast, these were cramps lasting 30 seconds to a minute and hit whenever they felt like it.
With no sleep for days in row, and at 9 1/2 months pregnant, my obstetrician took my husband aside and told him, “Your wife is exhausted. She isn’t going to live through childbirth unless she gets some sleep.”
Thus, I was given enough sedatives to knock out an elephant and awakened 8 hours later. Not long after that, my doctor used pitocin to induce labor.
When you have your first child, no one can prepare you for what’s coming.
I went from scratch-itch-ow to OH MY GOD JUST KILL ME, PLEASE! in 60 seconds. It felt as if my son had my backbone in his hands and he was trying to rip it out every 3 minutes.
Once the nurse got my attention by screaming at me, I started the Lamaze breathing exercises, and a few hours later little boy blue came into this world.
In fact, he was so blue that my husband thought Robert was born dead.
The doctor, unconcerned, did whatever doctors do to babies and his color returned to normal.
With all of the sedatives in my system, I fell asleep the moment my placenta left the building. I didn’t know about my son’s near death experience until I finally awakened.
Now that you know how he came into this world, I’ll tell you what he’s done with his life since that time.
Poetry, text books, peer reviewed articles, and papers.
This is his latest book of poetry, An Ode to Friendship but it’s on pre-order so I don’t know what’s in it yet.
This is my favorite of his poetry books:
He’s a full professor teaching Spanish and Portuguese language and literature. Yes, he speaks 3 languages fluently (English, Spanish and Portuguese).
In contrast, I can ask, “Where’s the bathroom” in 3 languages.
What’s his next great adventure?
The professor has become a student.
At the same University.
Imagine you’re a student seeing a distinguished professor, well respected in his field, walk into your class. You wonder what he’s doing in a music school. You don’t know that he’s always loved playing the oboe and wants to master the instrument.
You’re sitting in the oboe section and the professor from hell who expected perfection, in a class you barely passed, sits next to you.
Want to know what he says when a former student asks, “Dr. Simon, what are you doing here?”
He replies, “Call me Robert. I’m a music student, just like you.”
Did I mention he plays clarinet, sax, piano, guitar, and he’s learning the English horn, too?
That sunshine you feel lighting up your face is a mother’s pride in the man he has become: Excellent father, attentive son, stellar professor, and talented music student.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY ROBERT!
MAY YOU ENJOY MANY MORE.
Wow! It is a moment of Pride to a Mom like you. Your son is inspiring and a legendary learner. Many more Happy Birthdays Dear Robert ✨🎉💐
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Thanks for your kind words.
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Thank you so much for the birthday wishes! I’m fortunate to have such a talented mother, as well.
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🤗🎉Have a Lovely day Robert Simon 🎉🤗
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Happy Birthday, Robert!
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Thank you so much!
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HBD Robert!
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Thank you!!
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You must be so proud of him. Happy birthday to your son.
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Very proud.
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❤️
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Thank you! I’m proud of my mother for all she’s achieved as well.
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Yes, she’s one remarkable woman. 👍💖
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You are so kind. 😊
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❤️💖
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Happy birthday to Robert. Enjoy your proud mother moments today – you deserve them 🙂
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Thanks.
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Hope it was a great birthday. Cringed in sympathy at the “OH MY GOD JUST KILL ME, PLEASE!” moment, Mary – I recall it so well!!!!
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What’s strange is that a year and 10 months later, when my daughter was born, I knew what to expect and wowed the nurses by telling jokes between the times I had to push in the delivery room. What a difference a “little” experience makes. 😊
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It was, thank you so much!
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Thank you for such a heartfelt and meaningful entry. I’m proud of you, as well, for all you’ve achieved!
If anyone reading this post would like to get a copy of my latest book, you can find it at https://www.finishinglinepress.com/product/an-ode-to-friendship-by-robert-simon/ – I’d love to know what you think! I’m also happy to autograph your copy!
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You have been so supportive of my writing habit over the years. You were one of the first to read what I wrote. Even though it wasn’t very good, you gave excellent advice.
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🙂 Happy B-day to Robert. Looks like a talented family!
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Lovely post! Happy birthday Robert!! I was going to be called Robert, but had the wrong plumbing.
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That has ruined many a parent’s plans. My sister was named Bobby for that reason.
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I was named after the female lead in the book Mum was reading about a girl and her horse. Glad I wasn’t named after the horse!
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I rarely hear of people named after a character in a book. Don’t know whether or not it’s better than the trend of naming children after people who act for a living. It’s according to whether or not you like your name.
My better half and his siblings were named after actors and an actress. I believe that’s still a trend these days. The place where I work has four 20-somethings named Brittany. 😊
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OMG.
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My Mom’s doctor (in 1945) told her she was NOT pregnant, that she had a tumor. First they did radiation. When that didn’t work they operated – and found me in utero. So they sewed her back up and – in due time I was delivered (Caesarean, as you might guess.) So in spite of the best efforts by parents and doctors, sometimes everything turns out .
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I’m surprised the radiation didn’t kill you. Thank goodness you lived through it.
Things like your mother’s experience began the trend toward suing doctors. If nothing else, it did make many doctors cautious.
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Happy Birthday Robert what an amazing person you are and have become
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Happy Birthday Robert! Ok, the first part did not sell giving up my barren spinsterhood but you are a proud mum so I get that part………Cheers,H
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Sometimes, it’s worth the pain. Other times, the pain never ends. I have friends and family with several great children and one that is nothing less than criminal. Raised the same way, too.
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How wonderful. Happy birthday to Robert 🎉
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Thanks. 🙂
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What a lovely tribute to your son!
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Thanks. 😊
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