Senseless New Year Sarcasm : 2021

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Well, things are better today.  The bad neighbors let the puppies out, no doubt one of their informants in law enforcement tipped them off that they might get fined for stealing someone else’s property.

Not that I consider dogs property, no more so than I considered my children property.

It comes under the heading of, “WHATEVER WORKS.”

I like reading Tarot cards and sometimes I’m right — sort of like a clock stuck on 12:00 is right twice a day.  According to the cards, there will be a peaceful few months, then civil war worldwide.

Perhaps it’s best to try reading Tarot cards when I’m not wishing boils, scabies, and lice on my neighbors.  Actually, I’m not doing that, but it sounds so deliciously medieval.

I just wish they’d move elsewhere; like Antarctica.

On another bizarre note, while I was cursing my neighbors, the Tiny Terror finished eating my key lime pie.

There was half a slice left in the bowl, and now there are a few graham cracker crumbs.

Crummy cat!

Back to 2021

If 2020 was a pig poop sandwich with diarrhea dressing, I’m beginning to think that 2021 is going to be the exploding sewerage plant.

I can’t decide which will come first:

  • Meteor strike
  • Solar flare
  • EM pulse
  • Supervolcano, or
  • Everyone on Earth is sick of this COVID S#!t and we’re not going to play this game any longer.

Or perhaps a mile-high cat will appear through a wormhole from another galaxy and think the screamy things living inside New York City apartments are the best frappachino flavored treats ever.

Frappuccino | The Coffee Wiki | FANDOM powered by Wikia

Where I live, no one tastes like Starbucks.

We’re more like the bottom of a carafe once filled with Dollar General brand — after it’s been on the burner of a $15 Dollar General coffee pot for 10 hours.

Clover Valley Country Sunrise Blend Ground Coffee - 33 oz ...DOLLAR GENERAL Toastmaster Deluxe Digital Coffeemaker - 12 ...

Believe me when I tell you this; you don’t want to go there.

Hmmm….what if the cure for the next weaponized virus is 10 hour old Dollar General coffee?

I’d have the immune system of Wonder Woman.

Where ever you live,

Whatever you do,

Happy New Year and

may you survive to

2022.

Category : holidays, humor
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