Last night’s dream: Since I don’t remember the whole thing, I made some stuff up.
Imagine, if you would, a harried mother trying to rein in two boys. They don’t get to see dad very much; he lives in an alternate universe, and mom would prefer that he stay there.
Satan: You called?
Lilith: No. I was swearing! Our boys want you to visit them and I made the mistake of yelling out, “What the hell? You ungrateful little spawns of Satan!” Pay for the damned plane tickets to Dizzy World!
Satan: No need. I’ll turn Damion into a fly.
Lilith: He’ll be eaten!
Poof. He turns into a fly and lands on a frog.
Lilith: Bastard! He’s on the left hand of frog! What the hell is wrong with you? He prefers the right side of the plane. Did I mention he’ll be eaten?
Satan: Not if I turn the frog into a plane.
Lilith: What about Darth? Are you going to turn him into a fly, too?
Satan: No, I like him.
Lilith: If you can turn a frog in to a plane and a boy into a fly, Why not poof them onto the ghost ride?
Satan: Last time I did that, you called the FBI and said I’d kidnapped them.
Lilith: No. You have 2-day visitation rights. I called you after a week and told you to send them home. A brothel is no place to have kids running around. They’re 4 and 5, for God’s sake!
Satan: No problem. I was in jail for a day and everyone in the building went to hell with me when the place blew up.
Lilith: Speaking of “up,” what are you up to now?
Satan: I’m creating a new species out of humans and AI’s. They’ll be grey with big eyes and do my bidding without question.
Lilith: Don’t tell me – wait for it – they’ll travel through time in flying disks, slowly changing us into something we’re not.
Satan: How did you know?
Lilith: You have internet access down there.
Satan: Yes. Steve is terrific.
Lilith: Look up “grey aliens.”
Type, type, type…
Satan: Oh. Wish I’d thought of that.
Lilith: (sighing loudly): You just did! Time travel means you can think of it now and change the past.
Damion and Darth disappear.
Satan: We’re on the ghost ride at Dizzy world.
Lilith: Remember, they have to be back in two days or God will send the FBI after you.
Satan: Is that why they arrived so quickly?
Lilith: If a crocodile had Satan’s brains, it would forget to breathe!
God: Lilith! Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned.
Lilith: If you think I’m going to run hell again, give it up!
When I awoke, this was staring at me:
Maybe I should’ve named him Satan?
©Joelle (poetic license only goes so far) LeGendre