The most overused word
Once upon a time, I would tell people, “If you can’t get through a sentence without saying you know 10 times, please don’t speak to me!”
At least that was 2 words in a row.
And now? The most overused word has 4 letters, starts with F, and rhymes with truck.
Every time the word assaults my ears 20 times in 5 sentences I keep wondering if we’ve just discovered the world’s best IQ test.
I don’t have a lot of faith in the ones presently used. They’re supposed to test your verbal intelligence and what I like to call, “The other one.”
No two IQ tests are alike, and scores can vary. The first one I took was administered by a college student in a room with a white table and fluorescent lights. That was a disaster. The second one was 25 points higher, and the third was 9 points higher than that.
Did I mention that was the verbal IQ? The other one hovered between 30 and 40 points lower — and that’s why the nice man at disabled student services tested me for a learning disability. In a nutshell, this was the result:
- Verbal IQ: Graduate school level
- The other one: Elementary school
It means that “The other one” can’t be used against me to determine my intelligence, but I would just love to see another test added to the mix.
We need a test for social/emotional intelligence, and I have just the way to measure it!
For the last test, the participant has to wait in a room with a one-way window. The window inexplicably becomes translucent. The tester appears to be talking with an alien (a grey one would do nicely).
And then…
a grey hand appears to reach through the window and the number of times the test subject screams the F word is recorded.
The higher the number, the lower score s/he gets for social/emotional intelligence.
See? Wasn’t that easy?
There is a simpler way to test IQ. Just ask.
This is the 5 finger test for intelligence taught to me by a psychologist. You can ask someone to raise the number of fingers that represents their IQ:
- 1 finger = below normal
- 2 fingers = normal
- 3 fingers = above average
- 4 fingers = bright but no genius
- 5 fingers = genius
I raised 3 1/2 fingers. Apparently, that doesn’t count.
Most people pick the right number of fingers, except the ones that are insane.
Turns out, he was insane.
But remember: Just because he’s crazy doesn’t mean he’s wrong.
©Joelle (too smart for my own good) LeGendre
I know someone who tested at a 165 IQ and swore all the time. Likewise, some very dumb people never do. It’s just a personal preference. I adapt to the situation, though I don’t think I swear when scared. Usually I go silent, which is another issue entirely. I wonder which is more evolutionarily favorable, the silence or the screaming? I guess it depends…
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Good point about going silent.
IQ tests only show that someone has potential. Anything after that falls prey to many factors.
I found a 2012 BBC article about unhappiness and IQ that said the happiest people have IQ’s between 120 – 129 and the unhappiest between 70 – 79. But I think they’re missing a very important consideration. I think they’re missing the unhappiness level for those at the other end of the spectrum.
I have rarely seen a happy genius
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That’s such a good point. That genius was my ex and he was always miserable.
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That started my morning with a huge chuckle. I must be insane …. I go for broke ….. a full 5 fingers!! Why not? What have I got to lose?
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You and your brother are both in the 5 finger range. I can’t keep up with y’all. 🙂
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What about the word Like? You know, like………xyz! Cheers,H
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Durn, shoot, and for some reason at an early age, when I was hurt I would yell out Ay Caramba!
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“You get me?” is the one that drives me insane. Yes of course I effing get you because a) I’m not deaf b) We speak the same dam language c) You are not saying anything remotely complex enough that I wouldn’t understand so for the love of god, yes I GET YOU! I’d say I’m three and a half fingers also. I find the more effs people put in a sentence the more it looses its intended impact.
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I’ve heard “You get me” repeated ad nauseum before, too, driven at me like a hammer.
When a particular phrase, or the F word, are used repeatedly what the other person is saying certainly does lose its impact.
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Cleverly written!
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Thanks. 🙂
Some day, there might be a fairly accurate test. By that time, all of us will be AI’s and won’t need it. Somehow, I’d rather not be around when that happens.
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I understand.
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You know, you must be onto something here. Tsk tsk tsk.
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