Senseless Sunday Sarcasm : World poli-ticks

The Tiny Terror, after two grueling days of enacting vengeance on Mom:

He discovered it’s harder to find your own food than wait for Mom to open a can.  

He didn’t come home alone.  He had this tacked to his butt:

Big Fat Tick | Flickr - Photo Sharing!

…and he didn’t seem to notice the shiny mass hanging off his rear like a bizarro earring — until I tried pulling it out.  Then, he became Pretzel Cat.

He squirmed around until I stopped trying to remove the butt-sucking parasite. 

Satisfied he’d won that battle, he slept soundly.

That’s when I pulled off the tick in one, quick twist of the wrist.  His eyes popped open, he looked over at me, and returned to sleep.

After a burial down the toilet befitting a tick, and a heartfelt, “Good riddance,” as its eulogy, I returned to my computer, wiped cat hair off the keyboard, and considered the similarities between ticks and politicians worldwide:

  1.  Once they’re in office (aka, adhered to your butt) they’ll suck the system dry.
  2. They know how to fool you.  While a tick administers anesthesia, politicians use smooth words to lull you into believing they’re not sucking the life out of you, they’re doing you a favor.
  3. You’ll put up with it and allow them to stay in orifice office simply because the ticks wanting to take their place are worse.
  4. When you finally understand that poly-ticks are the same no matter which side of the butt they suck from, they’ve burst forth multiple laws that give them immunity to prosecution, the best health insurance, and the highest salaries.  

One day, there will be term limits, politicians in the USA will get their medical treatment through VA hospitals, and their salaries will reflect the amount of work they do.

If you believe that, you’ll probably believe this, too:

Unicorn MAN Meme - ImgflipBadass ninja cat riding a unicorn...Rainbow! | .:•:i ...

Sorry folks, this is only true for cats who sleep 18 hours a day and know a can of cat food will be opened at 7:00am and 5:00pm.

And politicians

The rest of us live in the real world.