Senseless Sunday Sarcasm : grit
Cooking is to art…
as Picasso is to casserole
Grandma Moses is to cheese grits
Michelangelo is to an extraordinary wedding cake
or Georgia O’Keefe is to jello.
My mom passed along her culinary skills to her youngest daughter (me).
If my cooking was compared to art…
…you might recognize what it is, but you wouldn’t want to go there.
And yet, there are some things that even I won’t eat.
Being raised in the south by two people from the south, I didn’t have a bagel until I was in my 20’s, pastrami was a foreign object southerners avoided at all costs, and anything other than a recognized pork product (bacon, sausage or ham) served with bread, cereal, eggs or grits was an affront to the traditional breakfast.
Now…imagine you’ve never before heard of a bagel, or met anyone who ate whitefish for breakfast. Then you marry someone from up north.
You’re used to having this for breakfast
Your honey fishes this out of the fridge
The eyes stare up at you, pleading for mercy as your honey starts to dig into its midsection.
You finally get past the phase where the toilet is your friend and you can sit at the table with a bowl of grits…
when the unthinkable happens.
Who knew that whitefish, or tongue sandwiches, couldn’t cause infertility?
You have a child, and when he’s 2 years old he has on his high chair a…a… *shudder* plate of grits and whitefish.
This isn’t art, it’s sacrilege.
I don’t mind the art. I’m imagine the food it represents. Guess again I won’t be venturing your way…….nicely done. Cheers,H
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My cooking won’t kill you, it just isn’t artistic. I can boil water without a problem, too. 🙂
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Love this. I can’t stand fish with eyes in…..x😸🐟🐾🐾
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Thanks. 🙂
The eyes are just too much for me, too.
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Haha, Joelle, this is very good.
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Glad you liked it. 🙂
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Thanks for the laughs! Remind me sometime to confess about the peanut butter and mayonnaise sandwiches I used to carry to school in my lunch box.
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I’ve known people who would eat peanut butter and mayo sandwiches with and without bananas. And other un-jelly like behavior. 🙂
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I’m a New Yorker, I’ve seen people let their babies teethe on bagels. We start them early. That said, I won’t go near fish with eyeballs!
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My kids father was from Brooklyn. Fantastic husband and father who passed away too soon. We used to laugh about my son wanting grits and gefilte fish for breakfast. My husband would say “Ugh…grits.” I’d say “Ewwww fish” and my son, eyes sparkling, would take a bite of each. All of us would laugh. Funny the things that come through as the extraordinary moments in life. 🙂
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No, “this is” hysterical! 🙂
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