Senseless Sunday #Sarcasm: Nothing to eat


Happy Dog:  I’m very unhappy!

Other Brother Coon Cat:  You want unhappy?  How’s about letting me use you as a pillow for a while.

Rottie Mutt:  Mmmm…kitty gift…

OBCC:   When it’s time for me to poop, you’ll be the first to know.  It’s not something I can hurry along!

HD:  Mom always gives us a little food after she eats.  I miss egg and cheese, chicken, oatmeal with turkey bacon.  Turkey bacon…mmmm.

RM:  She’s drinking that white stuff in a bottle.  It tastes like the time I tried to lick rust off a pole.  

HD:  She calls it a nutritional shake.  That’s all she eats, tea and white stuff.  We’re worried she’ll never give us treats again. 

OBCC:  Why should I care?  Coon Cat and I know how to badger her until she opens our canned food.  We’re very unhappy she gives you reprobates some of our food, too.

HD:  I can’t reprobate, my last mom had my balls cut off.

OBCC:  Why do I bother?  

RM:   Mmmm…kitty…he smells just like…

HD:  …Turkey bacon!!!

Mom:  Rottie Mutt!  Stop trying to eat your brother!

RM:  Oh, Dog!  She read minds!

HD:  It isn’t hard to know what you’re thinking when you’re holding his head in your mouth.

OBCC:  It’s not like you’re starving.  There’s the perpetual dry food bowl and Dad still gives you treats.

RM (with a big sigh): It’s just not the same.

Mom:   Doggie, doggie, doggies!  Come get a biscuit.

*run, run, run…munch, munch, munch*

OBCC: (leisurely walking up to Rottie Mutt):  Satisfied?

RM: (sniffing OBCC’s rear):  Not until I’ve had dessert.