How a cat looks when a dog tries to herd it.

Years ago, I had a dog that wasn’t quite right. Yep, she fit right in with the rest of the family. Part Chow and part Rottweiler, the psychopathic half of her personality shattered through a fragile window of stability with little provocation. Had her former owner not abused her, bath time wouldn’t have required a muzzle and lots of sweet talk, nor would we have had to take precautions to tell any slender, white male stranger he’d better not step onto the property. No man with an ounce of sanity who saw those unfocused crazed eyes, heard that growl and witnessed the bared teeth ever tried to test her resolve.

The one personality that might have been the same had we raised her was a well entrenched herding instinct. But being not-quite-right her choice of animals to herd were cats.

How does a dog go about herding cats? First, run around 5 or 6 felines laying in the front yard. Then start to bark. The cat nearest her might jump Halloween-style before running into a tree/wall/car, or he might swat her on the nose with an open claw then run like hell. A few would lay there ignoring her. The usual result would be several cats scattering for trees, staring down at her as if to say, “Are you crazy?”

By this time, you should know the answer to that question. If the new cliche of insanity is true (doing the same thing over and over again and expecting a different result) she certainly fit the definition. She departed this world long ago, but the vision of her trying to herd cats still remains.